Prone to Ponder

too good to be

Like every follower of Christ, I have moments of doubt and disbelief. After all, …faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1

This is what faith is, it’s an action word. It’s deciding to put your heart where it cannot possibly get all the answers it so desperately wants. It is accepting that fact and making the decision anyway, because you trust in the source of your faith. It is not blind, but it’s a choice based on truth. I know God is real, I know His hand is guiding everything in our universe, I know He sent His son for us. There are a million reasons why I know these things, and for me, faith is my decision to hold onto them, pursue them, and try to walk in the light.

But I’m an extreme ponder-er. I think way too much and I analyze everything over and over again. Do You love me, God? Really? Am I important to You? How can You tolerate everything in this world? How can You put up with me, always changing and falling, meanwhile You are unchanging, never falling, never wavering?

I often consider the people who have dedicated their lives to being staunch atheists, constantly attacking Christianity, making fun of the idea of God and mocking His followers. They accuse our God of being heartless and of permitting suffering, death and dying. They say a God who puts up with this is not a God to worship.

Then there are those who just laugh God off as some fairytale. They see themselves as the captain of their own life. They have a family, work a 9-5 for thirty years, have experiences, go through the good times and the difficult times, and they never stop to consider if there is a divine purpose in this world and in their own life.

I think about these people a lot and I have a hard time understanding those reactions. Because, do you know what makes the most sense that I never see?

“No way. Nah uh. I call BS! Too good to be true!!”

I think that’s more like it. This is the warranted reaction to our God. A God so magnificent, so awe-inspiring, that He is beyond the best things in this life that we can even imagine.

“Wait, are you serious?! There is a God above ALL of this who created me and has a plan for me? Who listens to my deepest desires and forgives the ugly choices I’ve made? A God who, though He is more beautiful and more powerful than I can imagine, left His Heavenly throne to come and experience this human condition, just so that He could make a way to save us from ourselves? A God who is completely just and will do away with the evil in this world and the evil in my life? A God who conquers death and is giving me the chance to conquer death too? What! I just cannot believe that, it is too good to be true.”

This is how I feel sometimes. It’s too wonderful, too hard to believe that a God who can create, destroy, heal, and raise from the dead would love us, care for us, wait for us, and save us. But this is what we have, an awesome and mighty God who is personal and lovely and with us always. Wow. Praise God.

Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.
Psalm 145:3

2 thoughts on “too good to be

  1. great post, I can so relate to over thinking things and having doubts and questions that go unanswered. It’s a struggle to believe and I thank God that He is always faithful even when I lack faith.

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